Mr. Burleson,
I was given your contact info. by Bob Allen of Ethics Daily. I also just stumbled upon your blog. I was researching Dallas and SBC information and read about Joel Gregory.
My situation is that I am involved in a struggle here in Jacksonville, Florida trying to insure that a preacher here never reaches the pulpit again. His name is Darrell Gilyard. He has a 20 year history of abuse and sexual misconduct of his members wives and young women. In recent years, he has turned to young minor girls (ages 14- 16). He is facing charges currently her in Jacksonville - I was a 18 year old victim of his in 1991. There was a huge cover up back then (he was a Pastor at Victory Baptist in Dallas then) and Paige Patterson (and others) knew of his problems and did not help any of the victims back then. Long story. Now this man has been Pastoring a local church here for the last years (1993-2007) and is abusing still.
I was attacked by Patterson personally for speaking out with my story and the need to get this man out of the pulpit. He uses his power as a Pastor of a Mega church to abuse. There are more than a hundred victims in his past. The cover up by prominent Pastors and leaders is truly amazing. The State Attorneys office cannot even believe what he has been allowed to get away with.
I am not out to get anyone or to attack Patterson etc. - I just want to make sure that this man does not go unpunished and be allowed to move on to another church. No more victims.
The problem is he still has supporters within the churches, politically within our community, and then Patterson and others saying that we shouldn't be talking about it, let the church handle it. 20 years is long enough to "let them handle it". Gilyard was a "golden boy" of the SBC, Criswell, Patterson, Vines etc. when his problems were first brought to light. He continued to have their backing for the last 17 years - this gave him more power. People are disgusted that they allowed him to move on and not warn everyone.
I know that God will have His way with Gilyard, He will answer - I am just concerned for future victims. The impact he will have on their lives, and possibly their faith. He should not be allowed to continue. Many are still trying to keep it quiet. By the way each church he has been in since 1987 has left a trail of victims and he has always been forced to (quietly) leave. Why the politics of covering up horrible, damaging sin?
Any suggestions or help?
Thank you,
Tiffany Croft
http://tiffanycroft.blogspot.com/
thefamilycircus5@comcast.net
Tiffany, when you and other courageous women like yourself speak out, awareness is raised of the horrible issue. I, again, promise to help you and others to the best of my ability. We will ensure that something is done on the national level.
In His Grace,
Wade
210 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 210 of 210Crista,
I would make one suggestion to you: please do not go on blogs like roboped with all these charges. I fight on this blog every couple weeks trying to defend the Christian faith as best I can. I mean this in both in love and in concern of defending the Christian faith before a lost world.
Why should you not post your articles on roboped? It is the most anti-Christian blogs I know of anywhere. It consists mainly of professed atheists (I do not believe there is such a think as an actual atheist), agnostics, Muslims, Jews, homosexuals and every type of lostness the world has to offer.
I read your articles posted on roboped and wondered why as an evangelistic Christian woman you would go before those mentioned above with your case. It is a very popular site and is read around the world.
Not every male Christian staff is a pervert. My son is a law enforcement officer as was my step father and my biological father (whom I never knew). It only takes a couple rogue policemen to make a whole police force look rotten; it is the same with doctors, lawyers, school teacher or ministers. My son will also tell you when a burglar is removed out of the community; sometimes it clears up as many as a hundred burglary cases.
I use this example because a sex pervert gets his sexual climax from the perversion. With any sexual release, the sexual build up for another release becomes uncontrollable within three for four days leading to another incident and another. When a minister has had something to surface concerning sexual aberrant accusations more than once or twice, the Christian community must take action and harsh action to protect innocent people from being hurt. It must also be very careful that the minister is not falsely accused of such a horrendous sin. I can give you about ten cases I personally know about and three that I dealt with as Chaplain of RGCH with about eighty children in our care. I can tell you how two sixth grade boys set up a sixth grade teacher with an iron clad case it seemed until one of them caved in about a very elaborate scheme to destroy Mrs. J.
A lady in my church in Springtown, Texas was in a Piggly Wiggly Supermarket in Ft Worth. She was looking at the cards and put one between the sweater she was carrying and her arm. She bought something and walked out the door when a person stepped up beside her and said, "Maam, you need to come with me to my office." She asked what for and he advised her she was not under arrest but could be for theft. She went to the office and he asked her for the card, the card she had forgotten that was still in her arm. She was not charged, but warned. It was a month before she could tell her husband and a year before she could tell her grown children; needless to say she did not announce it to the Church Sunday morning when she stood behind the pulpit to sing special music.
The last thing a church staff is going to tell anyone is that he or she has been accused of child molestation or sexual abuse. The 1- to 4 percent is very questionable. I would say maybe sixty to seventy percent over a thirty year ministry have been falsely accused one time or another or at least gossiped about my someone in the church. If my church member was scandalized over a three dollar card, what would have been her reaction over the charge of molesting a thirteen year old boy in her care? Every member asks himself,"If falsely accused, how do I defend myself?"
Only By His Grace,
Phil.
Charles,
I will say I did not enjoy reading the ‘priest story’. In fact, it was repulsive.
Today, I did not enjoy reading the Dallas Morning News saying one in four teenage girls have a sexually transmitted infection.
Christians need to wake up and start a ‘cleanup’. And the best place to start would be at the top.
Rex Ray said...
Charles,
I will say I did not enjoy reading the ‘priest story’. In fact, it was repulsive.
Today, I did not enjoy reading the Dallas Morning News saying one in four teenage girls have a sexually transmitted infection.
Christians need to wake up and start a ‘cleanup’. And the best place to start would be at the top.
Only by his grace: You ask why I would post articles on opednews.com. (1) I have no reason to consider it an "anti-Christian" site, as you describe it. (2) It's been months, and perhaps as much as a year, since I posted on that site. Thanks for reminding me about it. I should use it more often. (3) I went to the secular press only after the failure of long, protracted, and repeated efforts to get the attention of Southern Baptist leaders about the extent of the clergy abuse problem and the need to effectively address it. (4) I believe incalculable damage is done to the faith of countless individuals and to the faith community itself by the blind-eyed, do-nothing responses of religious leaders to the scourge of clergy sex abuse. (5) Until Southern Baptist leaders begin effectively addressing the problem and compassionately reaching out to the wounded, I intend to continue, along with SNAP, in using every media resource I can muster to shine light on this problem. (6) I believe the safety and well-being of kids, congregants, and families are what's at stake.
OK Wade,
I’ll give up trying to get my last comment to go where I wanted it to go, but I feel like our conversation was cut off and I wanted my second reply to relate to my first reply to Charles.
I was thinking how I could relate an old tale to the topic of persecution. Here it is:
My brother was being PERSECUTED by the umpire in high school: “I’m throwing you out for throwing a ‘bean ball’!”
Catcher: (me) “He didn’t hit him on purpose. You see how wild he is. He doesn’t have enough control to hit anyone in the head.”
“You’re right about that. OK, keep pitching.”
BTW, he’s throwing the first pitch in today’s Ranger game at Phoenix (He’s recovered from Valley Fever and organized an ‘over the hill’ ball team that will be introduced at today’s game.) The organizer was asking him: “Can you do a ‘wined-up’?
“Yes.”
“Can you do a ‘high-kick’?
“Yes…if I don’t do it too high and fall backwards.”
“Hey! I’ve heard about your tricks…you’re not going do anything stupid are you?”
“Well, I though about coming to the mound with my ‘blind cane’ and throwing the ball at the dugout.”
“You wouldn’t do that!”
“You’re right…I wouldn’t do that. Don’t worry.”
See…I’ve said before if I were James writing about Jesus, the Bible would be an inch thicker.
Rex
I wish more people would find the story repulsive. Sadly they find the messenger repulsive for telling it, even the victim himself. Christian censors would be pleased if I would be quite and "lead souls to Christ" but I would be pleased if a sodomizer gets what is comming to him! That act of severe justice will lead souls to Christ.
Sinners will fall to their knees and confess of a truth that God is in our midst.
Charles
Sharon, thanks for your help and thoughts on this. I think my comments about whether there was sexual exploitation or consensual immorality agree with your "adult who is vulnerable," if I understand you correctly. IOW, a clergy's immoral act with a woman can become illegal if she is in a position of vulnerability because of his being a clergyman.
The thoughts in this thread caused me to look up Texas state law to try to better understand the issue. What I found from a search at "Texas Statutes Penal Code" seems to indicate that this applies to a clergymen as a "mental health services provider" (I assume, counseling). Specifically it says, (2) "'Mental health services provider' means an individual, licensed or unlicensed, who performs or purports to perform mental health services, including a...(E) member of the clergy" and "'Mental health services,' as defined by this section, provided by a member of the clergy does not include religious, moral, and spiritual counseling, teaching, and instruction." This is in Chapter 81 of the "Civil Practices and Remedy Code." I'm no lawyer, so sometimes I don't understand this stuff. And there may be other laws that relate to this as well.
Your comments also bring up another couple of issues. IMO, the power and authority of pastors is somewhat "out of control". In some cases a single pastor or senior pastor may be theoretically answerable to his congregation yet practically answerable to no one. Also, the clergy-laity divide in Baptist churches is greater than in the New Testament. You also mention counseling. IMO, pastors should not be doing the "inside your head" type of counseling. And even those who believe they should would surely admit that many pastors are not competent to counsel. I know I am not. I can give Biblical counsel -- this is what the Bible teaches -- but I found long ago that this is not what most people want to hear.
See also Texas Penal Code sec. 22.011(b)(10) which addresses a clergyman's professional role as a spiritual adviser. This is separate from the provision relating to a clergyperson's possible role as a "mental health services provider."
Found it. Thanks.
"A sexual assault under Subsection (a)(1) is without the consent of the other person if...(10) the actor is a clergyman who causes the other person to submit or participate by exploiting the other person's emotional dependency on the clergyman in the clergyman's professional character as spiritual adviser..."
I have read most of these comments. Frankly, I find some very disturbing.
I was sexually abused by a Southern Baptist minister when I was 23. Since I was of age, and he didn't force me, all who I told considered it an affair.
But here's the key difference between this and an affair. I was in a vulnerable place in my life. I was a fairly new Christian, and had just recently realized that Jesus could help me. But I wasn't really all that sure how he could help me. So I went to my pastor, who I had absolutely no interest in sexually (he was 52 and looked older than that) to find out how Jesus could help me. Through a period of counseling over several months the pastor convinced me of several things. One was that Jesus could not help me. Another was that God didn't really love me. Another was that he, my pastor, could help me. And the help he offered was first sexual talk then the act.
At first I fought the misteachings about God, and the teaching that the only thing that could help me was sex with the pastor. But when you are told the same thing over and over by a man you trust, that you thought was a real man of God, you believe it after awhile. And when you are told that pastors are men of God, what can you do? That is the brainwashing some of the commenters were talking about. Young, vulnerable women searching for God, and finding only perversion.
So, no, a grown woman having sex with her pastor is not an "affair"; especially if he is in any way counseling her. He has a lot of power over her, and just as people trust pastors to teach them right, a new Christian can quite easily fall for teachings that are totally wrong.
It has been 19 years. Between therapy, good friends, good churches, and good pastors, I feel that I am almost all the way back. But it has taken a lot of years, and a lot of tears, to undo the damage that man had done to my view of God, myself, church in general, the Southern Baptist denomination in particular, and pastors.
I am a Southern Baptist, by the way. I left the denomination for awhile, because I didn't think I could find God here, but I came back and have been a member of a good Southern Baptist church since 1997. I have realized there is a lot of good in this denomination. I have also encountered a lot of cluelessness among people that I have talked to in my journey of healing. I do think that our denomination needs to do a much better job of getting, and keeping, pastor - predators out of the pulpit. And we can't completely rely on the law; many child abuse victims don't come forward until it's too late. In some states, a pastor who takes advantage of the vulnerability of grown women who come to him for counseling, exploit them the way I was exploited, is breaking the law. Unfortunately, in many states, unless he is a licensed counselor, and most pastors aren't, he is not breaking any law.
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